Do you ever get the feeling that you haven't even one ounce of a clue what you're doing? And not only are you stumbling through without any direction whatsoever, but you're also under the watchful (and very critical) eye of every other person you come into contact with? Yes, normally I would agree with you that it sounds a little paranoid. But not when you're the mother of a 2-year-old.
Now I could simply end this post here and the majority of you (the parents at the very least) would nod their heads in sympathetic agreement and have a full understanding of what I'm saying. They don't call it the "terrible twos" for nothing. And if you've somehow been blessed enough to never have had to deal with a moody "I-just-had-my-2nd-birthday-and-I-own-the-world" toddler, I'm sure you'll get your comeuppance once your child's hormones explode in his or her early teens.
'Cause that's what it feels like to have a temperamental tot hanging around. One moment all is well with the world. Smiles, giggles, laughter and fun galore. Then suddenly the sky is falling, disaster strikes, heads spin, and a strange demon replaces the little cherub who was, just a split second before, standing at your side. This little imp is extremely strong, wakes the dead with her screams, is slippery as a fish and just as hard to hang on to, and next to impossible to reason with. Did I mention pocket-sized teenager?
What do you do when the gremlin who was once your child doesn't listen, despite being given several opportunities to do so? When she goes stiff as a board or throws herself to the ground? When she drops to her knees screaming in the middle of crossing a busy street, and you're literally carrying her in the air by her hand out of the way of oncoming traffic? Or when you give her options (as is recommended with these headstrong little darlings) and she opts for "no"? And all the while all the "adults" in the crowd are shaking their heads, so obviously thinking how they would do it different, would do it better, that their kids wouldn't act that way ... or worse, provoking that child to make her more upset and bringing out Momma Bear.
The answer? Pray. Pray for patience. Pray to remain cool-headed & unruffled. Pray to not do what you have so often done: reacted. And, of course, pray that, no matter what I do, this beautiful and amazing little one whose life has been entrusted to us grows up unaffected by my inadequacies.
I just hope the answer to my prayers isn't simply to give me more opportunities to test it ...
